Here’s one I guess I never posted from last summer… lol enjoy.
Yes. Ducks.
Now I haven’t made a new post in quite a while. Could be my laziness. Could be my lack of discipline. And yet, I’ve travel to other states, run a children’s summer camp, and trained for a 5K since my last post. So don’t think that I’m just doing nothing. Not the case. But I will admit that I often think of posting and there’s always quite a bit of guilt and stress when I don’t. Anyway, enough. On to the ducks. Now, my feelings about ducks has been consistent for a number of years. I am suspicious about them. Well, just ducks actually are quite dandy. I guess this post is really about geese. GEESE. Jeez. If you go to parks, if you’ve gone to a lake, if you’ve gone outside, gracious, if you’ve seen a goose, you know what I’m on about. They are sleeze-buckets.
Not even sure what that meant, but look here. A child feeds a duck with the crusts of today’s half-eaten PB&J. Cute. The unwelcome crasher of this party, of this veritable storm of cuteness: the goose. NOT CUTE. Geese are selfish and bulky. They ALWAYS get in the way and eat the carbs that you chuck out to the nice ducks. You KNOW that duck has been waiting on that cheap enriched wheat flour white bread all flipping day long and for what? A freaking GOOSE to chow down on it instead? This is why I have goose rage.
And I used to be afraid of geese. Yeah, they can be scary, but I’ve found a method that works for me. You gotta be the man. I mean, I’m an average girl, but I’m the man. Walk up like you own the place. You basically do with your taxpayer dollars. You’re bringing the literal and figurative bread, so bring it. I walk up to a goose like I walk up to a Taco Bell. (Large and in charge.)
The hissing isn’t scary anymore. You just don’t back down. And I don’t. I just dance at them with my headphones like some kind of escapee from the happy house.
These are my real friends. The ducks. That was the end result after I ran through them, by the way. There they are, placid, unconcerned. Cheese biscuit, I love ducks.